Although it has been no walk in the park. Going from a university department that to this day I considered to be like a family, where you knew everyone, and going to class was a joy because I was around faculty and other students that made me enjoy each day being there. As well as the support and encouragement I received while being there has made me realize how lucky I was to be around that. Being supported to continue my dream of stage management, and being told that I do have the potential has made me work hard each and everyday to make this happen. Even though it has been tough, and has been basically starting over, I would never want to go back and do it differently.
With that, I have had my doubt more than a couple times this year of whether I can reach my dreams, and if I should just have one of those "typical" jobs that everyone has. What's kept me from doing this? Realizing how much I enjoy going to rehearsals and performances each day, and of course my parents. There have been many times I have called to my parents crying, thinking I have failed them and have struggled with many things. Their constant support and not letting me give up has in a way been a push to keep me going. I hate disappointing my parents, and the fact that they believe in me so strongly has been a key motivation into continuing.
Starting off this year, I had the chance the intern on an amazing production, "Smokefall" at the Goodman Theatre. Honestly this production made me realize what professional theatre is like, and how you CAN make a profession out of stage management. Learning under an amazing stage manager Kim Osgood, has honestly inspired to continue through what will the toughest years of my life, but you will be rewarded if you work hard and pay your dues (literally, thanks AEA). Going from there and working on various storefront non equity shows, and dabbling in a bit with equity shows has really showed me what professional theatre. The people I have met in each of these productions are truly amazing, and their stories of how far they have come are an inspiration.
Recently during my time back at the Goodman Theatre for "Ask Aunt Susan", I had the chance to work someone who typically does stand up comedian work at Second City. To hear her story how she just decided to pick up, move to Chicago, and pursue her dream of working there really shows how you can make anything happen, and its all about making yourself achieve that. No one is going to hold your hand out here in the real world, if you want something you have to earn it yourself.
I honestly can say that this year has been difficult, but yet so rewarding. Although it can be tough not knowing what you are going to do next, though I have been lucky with always have a show up next, in a way it can be an exciting way to live. For now I know my heart and dreams are here in Chicago.
